MRI day

Today was MRI day, the first of many tests and procedures I have to go through before the surgery. The MRI is the easiest because it is the least invasive.
However, I am claustrophobic. Not terribly, but enough to get upset about being stuck in a narrow tube for 40 mins. I had to get the MRI with/without contrast. This means they take a series of images then pull me out and start an I.V.- inject a contrast dye, then stick me back in the machine for more images.
Seems routine. I've had several in my Epileptic lifetime. Shouldn't be too ridiculous right?

I took an Ativan prior, per doctors orders, so I wouldn't freak out and run away. (It only happened that ONE time).
Anyway, I checked in, filled out fun paperwork (Nope, haven't left the country recently. Nope, no pacemaker) and was called back way too fast. I was instructed to put on awesome hospital pants and gown and remove all of my piercings. Always a good time.
I was totally doing fine, then when I entered the room and saw the satan machine. That's when my heart got itself moving.

If you have never had an MRI or are curious, here's a video. The video was made for children. I got no headphones, I got no music. I got ear plugs and pillow things around my head to hold it still.








I was in there for the longest 25 minutes ever. EVERYTHING ON MY FACE WAS ITCHY. But in an MRI, you can't move, not at all. So I played episodes of Supernatural in my head. And went over my shopping list, and thought about world peace or whatever. I DID NOT think about Zombies and what if they happened while I was stuck in the machine. Nope, didn't think about that at all.
Maybe a little. Shut up. Dylan was in the waiting room, he said if Zombies happened that he would come in and get me out. So we had a plan.

After 25 mins of the loudest banging and knocking ever, they pulled me out to inject the dye. Here's where shit gets real.
I have super annoying veins. They are so tired of getting stabbed, so they hide. It takes someone with some skill to draw blood or start an IV. I was still stuck in the head helmet thing and just like, there. I was told several times not to move. EVERYTHING WAS ITCHY.
The MRI tech couldn't find a vein. I directed her to the back of my hand. She couldn't see anything. So she called in Jeff, another tech. He couldn't find anything after tying and retying several parts of my arm. So they sent in tech #3. He found a vein! In my right arm. Things are moving right along. He starts the IV and starts injecting the dye. It hurt. My whole arm got hot, then cold. I started moving and he told me to keep my head still. I told him it was hurting and he looked down and said: "Whoops, blew that vein out"
WHOOPS. WHAT.
He taped it. I told him I was allergic to some of the tape and he wrapped my arms in heating pads and left.
You guys still with me? Remember, I am still laying on the MRI table with my head trapped in the ugliest helmet ever.
Time went by and Tech #1 comes in and tells me we are waiting for the lead Phlebotomist to help. OK. Moore time goes by and Tech #1 comes back and says she is going to try and start the IV. She stabs me once and I swear that was the longest needle I have ever felt. She finds nothing, bandages it. Then thinks she sees something and tries again. Inserts the needle and DIGS AROUND. I kicked straight out. I mean, WTF lady. I would have kicked HER if I could see her. She apologized. Once. Bandaged and walked out. Now I am worried they are going to leave me here forever and use me as a pincushion.
Several minutes later the Phlebotomist gets there. She picks up and arm, makes a mmhhhmm noise, sticks the needle in, tapes it to my arm and walks away. Done. Just like that. Tech #1 comes in and injects the rest of the contrast, puts me back in the tube and leaves. The fun noises start again and I just sort of lay there, thinking about how bad my arms hurt.
I was glad to leave.

Good Times.



















That's my MRI story. MRI's suck.
Next week I have a PET scan. I'll let you know how it goes.

-Mimi